Crazy people!!!!

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When Rajnikant was a Student…!!!

Teachers use to Bunk the classes!!!

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Ek Admi Rajnikant Se: Aapko Kaisa lagta hai jab aapke nam se itne jokes bante hai…

Rajnikant : Kya Appko sach much lagta hai! ki wo jokes hai… Mind it

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Rajnikant started college. All student were confused while taking admission because name of college is
“Rajnikant’s Medical College of Engineering for Commerce”.

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Rajnikant purchased a road roller…

Guess why??????

To Iron his Clothes……………………………

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THE MOST NEGLECTED FACT OF THE ENTIRE DECADE!!!!

Sach! in Tendulkar’s mothers name is RAJNI Tendulkar…

And his coach’s name is ramaKANT J

Is there a need to say anything beyond this???

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Once a farmer replaces scare crow in the farm with Rajnik! ant’s statue…

..And Birds returned grains they took last year as well

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If Rajni works in BPO, clients would work in shifts!

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Rajinikant got 150 questions in exam paper asking – “Solve any 100 questions”

He solved all 150 and wrote, ” Rascalla!, CHECK ANY 100!”

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One day Rajani thought to play cricket in monsoon and rain stopped due to play….

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Rajni has a notebook …Its called Facebook..

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Tonight at 9 Rajani can be seen in the sky… as he is participating in the Asian Games’ high jump event…

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What do you think Vodafone 3G tag line should be :-
Faster ..
Better…
RAJNIKANT….

No it should be (strictly)

RAJNIKANT.
RAJNIKANT..
RAJNIKANT…

Mind it
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Rajnikanth’s next project is the Titan! ic in Tamil. However, Rajni has twisted the climax. Both the lead acto rs survive. Rajni swims
across the Atlantic Ocean with the heroine in one hand and… the Titanic in the other

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“Who says the world will be destroyed in Dec 2012…..Rajnikant just bought a Laptop with three years warranty”…..:P
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Rajni can walk faster than light….

“Rajni cannot be created or destroyed, it can only be changed from one form to another”.

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Law of Conservation of Rajni

All scientists failed to answer this but rajnikanth did…
Ques: Which liquid turns solid on heating?
Ans: Dosa… mind it!!!
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Whn Neil Armstrong landed on moon he found Rajni smoking his cigg der………

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As soon as Graham bell discovered Telephone…he received first two calls from Rajnikant…..abt how to use it

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Once a photo of Rajnikant was givenfor Xerox. Don’t even try to guess what happened…
We got two copies of the Xerox machine.

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One more:

Once upon a time
Rajnikant used Tooth Powder to get strong teeth

Today that powder is known as

“AMBUJA CEMENT”
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Girl -> Rajnikant( Romantically ) :- “EAK CHUTKI SINDUR KI KIMAT TUM KYA JANU RAJNI BABU ?”

RAJNIKANT -> GIRL :- “0.0007892394623 RS. PER GRAM ….. ”

The Indian man said to the American, ‘We have problem in India we can’t marry the one whom we love, You know my parents are forcing me to get married to this so called homely girl from a village whom I haven’t even met once.’ We call this arranged marriage.

I don’t want to marry a woman whom I don’t love… I told them that openly and now have a hell lot of family problems.’

The American said, talking about love marriages… In America We can marry the one whom we love ……I’ll tell you my story. ‘I married a widow whom I deeply loved and dated for 3 years.

After a couple of years, my father fell in love with my step-daughter and married her, so my father became my son-in-law and I became my father’s father-in-law. Legally now my daughter is my mother and my wife my grandmother.

More problems occurred when I had a son. My son is my father’s brother and so he is my uncle. Situations turned worse when my father had a son. Now my father’s son, my brother is my grandson.

Ultimately, I have become my own grandfather and I am my own grandson.” AND YOU SAY YOU HAVE FAMILY PROBLEMS.

The Indian fainted……..!!!

A man checked into a hotel.

There was a computer in his room,
so he decided to send an e-mail to his wife.

However, he accidentally typed a wrong e-mail address,
and without realizing his error, he sent the e-mail.

Meanwhile… Somewhere in Houston ,
a widow had just returned from her husband’s funeral.
The widow decided to check her e-mail,
expecting condolence messages from relatives and friends.

After reading the first message, she fainted.
The widow’s son rushed into the room,
found his mother on the floor,
and saw the computer screen which read:

*
*
*
*
*
*
*
To: My Loving Wife
Subject: I’ve Reached
Date: 23 July 2008

I know you’re surprised to hear from me.
They gave computers here,
and we are allowed to send e-mails to loved ones.
I’ve just reached and have been checked in.
I see that everything has been prepared for your  arrival tomorrow.
Looking forward to seeing you TOMORROW!


Source: Wikipedia

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2. The most common name in the world is Mohammed.

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3. The name of all the continents ends with the same letter that they start with.

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4. The strongest muscle in the body is the tongue.

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5. There are two credit cards for every person in the United States .

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6. TYPEWRITER is the longest word that can be made using the letters only on one row of the keyboard.

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7. Women blink nearly twice as much as men!

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8. You can’t kill yourself by holding your breath..

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9. It is impossible to lick your elbow.

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10. People say “Bless you” when you sneeze because when you sneeze, your heart stops for a millisecond.

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11. It is physically impossible for pigs to look up into the sky.

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12. The “sixth sick sheik’s sixth sheep’s sick” is said to be the toughest tongue twister in the English language.

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13. If you sneeze too hard, you can fracture a rib. If you try to suppress a sneeze; you can rupture a blood vessel in your head or neck and die.

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14. Each king in a deck of playing cards represents great king from History. “Spades” – king David; “Clubs” – Alexander the Great; ” Hearts” – Charlemagne; “Diamonds” – Julius Caesar.

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15. 111,111,111 x 111,111,111 = 12,345,678,987, 654,321

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16. If a statue of a warrior on a horse has both front legs in the air, the person died in battle. If the horse has one front leg in the air, the person died as a result of wounds received in battle. If the horse has a all four legs on the ground, the person died of natural causes.

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17 What do bullet proof vests, fire escapes, windshield wipers and laser printers all have in common?

Ans. – All invented by women.

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18. Honey – This is the only food that doesn’t spoil.

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19. A crocodile cannot stick its tongue out.

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20. A snail can sleep for three years.

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21. All polar bears are left handed.

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22. American Airlines saved $40,000 in 1987 by eliminating one olive from each salad served in first-class.

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23. Butterflies taste with their feet.

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24. Elephants are the only animals that can’t jump.

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25. In the last 4000 years, no new animals have been domesticated.

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26. On average, people fear spiders more than they do death.

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27. Shakespeare invented the word ‘assassination’ and ‘bump’.

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28. Stewardesses is the longest word typed with only the left hand.

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29. The ant always falls over on its right side when intoxicated.

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30. The electric chair was invented by a dentist.

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31. The human heart creates enough pressure when it pumps out to the body to squirt blood 30 feet.

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32. Rats multiply so quickly that in 18 months, two rats could have over million descendants.

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33. Wearing headphones for just an hour will increase the bacteria in your ear by 700 times.

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34. The cigarette lighter was invented before the match.

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35. Most lipstick contains fish scales.

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36. Like fingerprints, everyone’s tongue print is different

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37. And finally 99% of people who read this will try to lick their elbow.

A man and his wife were having some problems at home and were giving
each other the silent treatment. Suddenly, the man realized that the next
day, he would need his wife to wake him at 5:00 AM for an early morning
business flight. Not wanting to be the first to break the silence (and LOSE), he wrote on a piece of paper, “Please wake me at 5:00 AM ” He left it where he knew she would find it. The next morning, the man woke up, only to discover it was 9:00 AM and he had missed his flight. Furious, he was about to go and
see why his wife hadn’t wakened him, when he noticed a piece of paper by
the bed. The paper said, “It is 5:00 AM. Wake up.”
Men are not equipped for these kinds of contests.

WIFE VS. HUSBAND
A couple drove down a country road for several miles, not saying a word.
An earlier discussion had led to an argument and neither of them wanted to concede their position. As they passed a barnyard of mules, goats, and pigs,
the husband asked sarcastically, “Relatives of yours?”
“Yep,” the wife replied , “in-laws”

WOMEN’S REVENGE

“Cash, check or charge?” I asked, after folding items the woman wished to purchase. As she fumbled for her wallet I noticed a remote control for a
television set in her purse. “So, do you always carry your TV remote?” I asked.

“No,” she replied, ” but my husband refused to come shopping with me,
and I figured this was the most evil thing I could do to him legally.”

UNDERSTANDING WOMEN: (A MAN’S PERSPECTIVE)
I know I’m not going to understand women.
I’ll never understand how you can take boiling hot wax, pour it onto your upper thigh, rip the hair out by the root, and st! ill be afraid of a spider.

W O R D S
A husband read an article to his wife about how many words women use a
day…. 30,000 to a man’s 15,000.
The wife replied, “The reason has to be because we have to repeat everything to men…
The husband then turned to his wife and asked, “What?”

CREATION
A man said t o his wife one day, “I don’t know how you can be so stupid and so beautiful all at the same time.”
The wife responded, “Allow me to explain. God made me beautiful so you would be attracted to me; God made me stupid so I would be attracted to you!”